A friend of mind is currently in the midst of searching for a job. She had a very good position at one of the country’s largest banks, but then they merged with another large bank and… Wham! My friend was a casualty of corporate downsizing.

For the past two months she’s been looking for another position.
First she tried contacting friends and people she knew in the business. Unfortunately, many were in the same or similar position—there are only so many banking jobs. She simultaneously was looking online trying to find a position that piqued her interest. With her qualifications and education, there was bound to be something. Finally, as a last resort, she looked in the classified section of the newspaper which, as we all know, will probably not get you a job.

In the end, after two and half months, she landed a job with a smaller bank but doing more of the things she originally went into banking for.

Job search. Love search. It’s all the same.
I tell you this story because my friend—a very attractive woman—becomes an absolute pain in the rear when she’s feeling down. She becomes extremely needy because wants to be in a relationship but hasn’t found the right guy yet.

When I ask what she’s doing to meet someone, she says she goes out but none of the guys she meets has what she is looking for. I think she believes “Mr. Right” is going to walk up to her in a bar wearing a sign.

And there lies the problem: We been told so many times in magazines and television that love “just happens.” Well, my fellow singles, here’s a news flash—love does not work that way. It takes a lot of work and perseverance. It’s like finding a new job.

I advised my friend to pursue love like she pursued her new job. Talk with her friends who might be able to “recommend” her to someone. If that doesn’t work, get online at Match.com, where you can be specific about who and what you really want.

Of course there’s always the newspaper, but it’s hard to find quality in the classifieds. At least with an online service or a friend, there’s the comfort of knowing that the person you’re about to meet shares some of your interests.

I’d give the same advice to anyone searching for love. Finding the love of your life takes work, but with the help of technology and sites like Match.com, it can be a lot easier than you think. Meet your match today!

Dwayne Hicks, Match.com